A newbie to the BDSM scene? and pretty sure your either a submissive (sub), slave, bottom or just a kinkster and your not sure about the whole ‘collar’ thing, well hopefully some of our blog posts will help you better understand about collars, what they’re for, who wears them, colour meanings, designs and how to choose the right one for you.
Newbie Collar –
Right at the start of me entering the kink scene as a newbie unattached (Vanilla & BDSM) submissive i managed to luckily find myself a very good Dominant mentor who regularly gave me sound and safe advice on beginning my journey as a vulnerable new subbie. He gave me one piece of advice on me eagerly wanting to attend my very first BDSM event at a private club was for me to be able to observe how the scene generally works, how people can play at clubs and events and how to interact with other kinksters. I was excited but hugely nervous thinking that i’d look like a scared little kinky lamb entering the perverted lions den. So he suggested that he accompany me to introduce me to various people on the local scene and that although not his submissive, just his mentee, that i wear a simple basic collar so that others would think that i was ‘taken’ and not bother me, freeing me up to just observe and enjoy my first event.
I bought a simple collar and wore it for the event at the private club that my mentor had gotten me invited to. The collar was like a kind of protection collar, not in any BDSM protocol capacity, but it worked well enough to make me feel safe when others looked to my neck and seemed to mentally acknowledge that i was taken and not to ‘bother’ me when i was not ready for such experiences quite yet. Having my mentor with me close by also added a great deal of security and the whole evening was a lovely experience meeting like minded people, making new friends and watching how BDSM’ers can play in clubs.
So your first collar could be one that you purchase and wear to your first BDSM event just to give you a degree of self protection if your not quite ready to get into full on play and have to deal with eager kinksters approaching you.
One thing to remember is that there are no set BDSM ‘time limits’ on how long or short that you may wear any of these collars described below for before progressing to a different type. Also it’s not set in BDSM stone that you’ll be presented with or wear all of the ones i’ve described below either, nor in the order, that’s something that your Dominant partner and/or you will discuss and decide on.
Consideration Collar –
If your a newbie (Term used for someone new to the BDSM scene) The consideration collar is probably the first type of significant collar your likely to encounter, and although not a collar used or acknowledged universally, this collar is a popular choice for many new BDSM relationships especially D/s and M/s (Dominant/submissive, Master/Mistress/slave) types. The definition of the consideration collar is quite literal. When your presented with this collar by a potential partner, and you wear this collar, it means that you’re under consideration to be their slave, submissive or bottom. Once you and your partner/s decide that you’d like to proceed further with a relationship then you can move up to either a training collar or one of the others described below. If the relationship isn’t what you or the partner/s want then it can simply be removed.
This style is pretty good for use as a Consideration collar, the classic O collar or ring collar. Note there shouldn’t usually be a locking buckle on this type for consideration.
Training collar –
Some would consider the next step collar as the ‘Training Collar’, but others may skip the consideration collar and go for a training collar first or even a Collaring collar, it’s personal preference, just remember nothing is set is stone as to how and why kinksters do things their way. The Training collar is typically worn by, but not exclusively by slaves while they’re being trained, submissives, bottoms and even regular kinksters wear them for the same purpose, and specifically newbies who haven’t a clue how it all works. It’s a symbolic visual reference to where the wearer is in their D/s, M/s BDSM relationship. Once your training is complete or your Dominant feels like you’re trained to their requirements, then you may be presented with a new type of collar to show progression of your relationship into a new stage.
Two different types of training collar as an example above, a three Dee ring design (above left) which is very versatile for may scenarios of training, whilst the posture collar (above right) is more designed to improve on poor posture, to stop neck movements and with the three Dee rings again very versatile.
Play collar –
This is probably the one you will wear the most during your BDSM relationship or single play journey, it’s the one you wear during a kinky play scene at home or at clubs and events etc. Personally we don’t follow any particular hierarchy of collars as such now, but i did initially have the consideration and training collars. I now have a physiological collar, simply for the reason of nearly been outed by myself when video calling a relative one night and forgetting I was wearing my collar. But many people do use the play collar partly to help getting into the right headspace for a scene/session. When I used to wear a physical collar Master would put it around my neck at home at the start of a session and my body and mind would immediately prepare itself for the experience to come. They are also useful to symbolise a power exchange relationship showing those around you in public play who’s in control.
A couple of examples of designs of play collars with either two or three Dee rings for various bondage and restraint situations, these may or may not be personalised with either the Dominants or submissives BDSM name or just a generic slave, sub reference.
Permanent/Collaring/Ceremonial Collar –
The permanent/Collaring/Ceremonial collar for some D/s, M/s and Kinkster relationships symbolises your status as a permanent BDSM partnership and it is as binding as a wedding band but not in a legal sense. For many this collar can be taken on and off depending on the agreed need for discreetness/privacy/secrecy of the wearer. But for others this collar has a locking mechanism or padlock and their Dominant has the key and they decide upon when and where, or if it can be removed at any time. Usually (but not always) this collar typically isn’t removed for any reason except the ending of the relationship which either the Dominant or submissive can do.
The importance of the symbolism of this collar is really down to each individual agreed partnership and it’s important to discuss with each other how you both feel about the use of them. Part of that discussion is having a clear understanding of what different kinds of collars mean to you both.
Just remember there are no set rules in BDSM as to when you’ll be presented with this collar, it may be some time before you receive this one, it may be only be three to six months or even a year or most likely longer, each Dominant is different as is each relationship. Also there’s no set BDSM protocol ceremony for a collaring union, that’s something either the Dominant will arrange alone as a surprise to collar you, or the couple will discuss and arrange it together.
For those of you who want to be collared, the day collar is a useful reminder of your BDSM relationship and your Dominant. It’s often a piece of jewellery type choker or simple elegant design leather, pvc or other material collar that can pass in the vanilla world as a fashion accessory to avoid unwanted questions. What matters most is that you and your partner know it’s a BDSM day collar, but no one else needs to know that if you don’t want to. It’s an important daily symbol to some BDSM practitioners as a sign of your kinky union and involvement in a BDSM relationship. I’ve read and heard that some submissive’s don’t wear a day collar around the neck, but may wear something similar more discreet around either the wrist or the ankle to signify being collard which again would avoid awkward questions being asked. I’ve seen that some submissive’s even have multiple styles/colours of day collars so that they’re always collared but have a look to match an outfit or occasion.
Protection Collar –
To the majority of people in the BDSM communities, collars symbolise ownership and a degree of protection, so will see a collared submissive/slave/bottom/kinkster and assume that they “belong” to a dominant person already. The protection collar affords the wearer the ability to be safely left alone by most other single Dominants/Tops/kinksters and without the same responsibility as a person wearing a training or consideration collar. As described by my own experience above that’s one reason applied to wearing of a protection collar, a mentor suggesting it as a safety net for a newbies first event/club etc. A submissive not yet under consideration but in communication with a potential long distance relationship Dominant might wear one to attend an event/club, so the Dom would suggest the wearing of for some protection. Another reason may be that a partner/partners in a polyamorous relationship may want the sub/bottom kinkster recognised as already being in a relationship with others.
Just remember that while it’s worn, it signifies that a Dominant/Top/Kinkster/Mentor takes some kind of responsibility for the submissive wearing it. And that the submissive represents the Dom/Top/Kinkster providing that protection.
Psychological Collars –
This is the one I wear and goes with every outfit I own and occasion i attend, and just because it’s invisible to others it’s importance is just as symbolic to us as any physical collar. A psychological collar can mean whatever you and your partner/s want it to represent in the relationship and again it’s down to the people involved agreeing to this in advance. I’m reminded of my collar everyday in everything that I do knowing that all my actions don’t just represent myself and reflect on me, but we as a partnership, a couple and most importantly, my Dominant.
Sometimes a sub, bottom, slave or kinkster may only be presented with just a single collar throughout their relationship, but it doesn’t mean any less in the BDSM community, it could actually mean more symbolic to the relationship, it’s all about how we as individuals and as couples/Poly want to interpret their own relationship.
I’ll cover the colour representation of collars in BDSM and what to consider when purchasing a collar in a later blog.
Written by Guest writer S’coo (submissive)
We all have that suit or dress reserved for special occasions, so why not enjoy something a little more luxurious, fancy or impressive when choosing kink gear?
At subspace leathers, we absolutely understand that one size does not fit all, and some people just want something different. For you we have our luxury collections!
We’ve got some great new ideas coming, but on our site we already have a fantastic selection of luxury sets.
You can enjoy things the way the Egyptians might have with our Pharaoh set, a beautiful distressed gold with solid brass fittings. Whether it’s a beautiful studded collar or full set of restraints, we can absolutely help you ‘walk like an Egyptian’. And if you don’t want your submissive to talk like one, we have extended this set to our full head harness gag. For those times where your sub just isn’t getting things right, we even have paddle’s and strap on harnesses. Sure to fulfil your ancient needs.
For those that want some ‘bling’ of another kind, which might be a little more friendly, we have our Unicorn and Playful pink sets. From pretty holographic collars and leash’s to unicorn floggers and beautiful pink restraints. This set is sure to make you stand out. We even have a lovely matching pink collar and leash if the holographic unicorn is not your thing.
Next we have our Grey Shades set. This is not your average set of bondage gear. Far from the tacky beginner sets you might find it high street stores, this is something much more refined. This set is perfect for beginners or seasoned players. You can choose from beautiful restraints in grey and supple red suede or one of our designer collars. We even have a wonderful set of three paddles which can be bought separately or as a whole. For those that are stating out and want something a bit higher quality, we even sell this set as a full restraint kit. It includes restraints for wrists and ankles, collar, leash, hogtie and blinds – and it’ll last you years rather than hours.
Lastly, in our current luxury range , COMMANDO set . Whether you are looking for your restraints to match your camouflage gear, or just want something a bit more unique, this is the set for you. Finished in beautiful grey camouflage, this set is will help you get seen rather than blend into the background. Heavy duty restraints and collars are a core part of this set, but beyond that we have a beautiful range of floggers, strap on harness and cock harnesses that take a supporting role.
Although this is the current range, we also are working on fantastic new ranges too, from our super heavy duty BRUISER set all the way through to Forest, Oxblood, Midnight and After Dark sets. Keep an eye on our website for more updates and details. And remember, if you can’t find it on our site, contact us directly and we can fulfil your desires through our bespoke service.
What does a Bespoke consult with us involve?
Well for starters good communication, let us know in as much detail as possible the outline for your project. Having an idea of the sizes, colour scheme, type of hardware, shape, lining etc all help along with any sketches that you have to show us your requirements. We’ll discuss with you the various leather options available, some hides that are not listed in our store, but we keep aside for special projects like yours, and any other lining materials, hardware or adornments we have in stock.
Contact can be made either directly discussing your bespoke idea with us via phone, by Email or any other Social Media messaging service or face to face with us at one of the events that we attend with our traders stand. You can find us at The London Alternative Market the first Sunday of the month at the Revolution bar on Leadenhall street, London.
Once you have conveyed to us your bespoke request and discussed with us the various options available, and processing time and payment method etc, we will then get back to you within a couple of days to give you a detailed free no obligation breakdown quote for the undertaking of your commissioned piece.
Creating Bespoke pieces and sets are one of our more pleasurable things to undertake and complete, and it’s very satisfying for us to be given a challenge to design something special and often one off for a customer who we hope will enjoy it as much as we did in making it.
Examples of some of our previous custom orders
Full AB/DL Harness and Accessory Set in a colour of leather that isn’t a regular colour option available, we’ve also made sets in Black and Red Italian leathers, among others
Locking Collar storage bag personalised with padlock and keys, and we’ve also had suede drawcord collar storage bags ordered with custom design collars.
And for the unusual requests, we created a very scary spiked roller, a replica American Police Uniform Belt for a customer and a phone/Card holder pouch as an example of some of the commissions outside of the BDSM Fetish realms that we’ve created, along with repairing handbag straps and re-affixing belt buckles. We are always happy to help if you get in touch!
We’ve made many one off Ceremonial or Charity Event Collars and personalised them, and been honoured to be asked to produce Two wedding Day commissions for customers.
One of the wedding Sets that was commissioned
Personalised Pairs or sets of restraint Cuffs and other bondage equipment for specific and annual events, or Dungeons
Designed with the customers direction, we’ve created unique restraint/bondage sets using brass hardware, other leather/suede/fur colours with diamante like crystal studs or spikes.
This Luxury white leather with soft fur was a recently commissioned set that included two brand new pieces with a fur-lined cinch and muzzle gag being central to the finished set.
It’s not just restraint and bondage ware that we get Bespoke requests for, often we’re asked to make custom colour combinations of floggers, personalising paddles and prison straps, or a completely new design of impact play toy like our Brat paddle (London tan image above) or our Spiked paddles that ended up becoming one of our most popular products.
Sometimes as a bespoke request we get asked to just make modifications to our existing designs like with this Adam strap on that the customer wanted a butt plug attachment adding.
We can personalise a Bespoke Commission with custom-made embossing stamps for graphics, logos or words (including people’s own font choice) and symbols up to nine characters in length. This is an ideal solution for those wanting to personalise their own play kit, or dungeon ware or just want a gift embossed for special occasions. The stamps can be re-used over and over so anyone wishing to purchase a full range of leather gear from us can have it embossed to their own specifications.
Here is an example of a recent acquisition of a very large buttery soft exotic black Zebu hide. Some of the many Rainbow colours of Luxury high-quality suedes we have in stock along with some of the various hardwood flogger handles available.
A rainbow collection of colours in some of our thinner leather hides we use. Various textured short and long haired real fur skins for use in projects, mainly our Cosplay ranges of items.
Examples of Some of the different type of leathers, Suedes and furs we often have in stock but maybe not used for listing our regular products, but can be used for Bespoke orders;
Buffalo, Zebu, Bison, Goat, Pig, Cowhide, Elk, Moose, Metallic leathers, Ostrich Skin, Patent leather, Grained Saddle and English Bridle leather, and Italian and Belgium leathers of various gages.
There are also a different selection of coloured sewing threads available for either machine or hand stitched projects, and many different types of hardware to adorn your ideas.
Quite often a request is made that requires a specific colour or type of leather/fur/suede etc that we don’t have in stock, but that isn’t a problem for us as we have three main suppliers that have a huge range of resources that we can call upon. And because many bespoke compositions are outside of our regular handmade production stock, we design customer brand new pattern templates which can be used.
Once a design has been agreed, specifications and processing times are approved by the customer and ourselves, then the customer will make payment and then we’ll set about the processing of the order.
One of the items we get asked about most is our Fetibear range. After-all, how can you not love our cuddly friends who are as kinky as we are?!
The questions we do get asked a lot, is how they came about, so, we thought we’d share with you the story how they came about and more generally share a little more information with you.
Their inception was surprisingly snap of the moment. Whilst walking through a charity shop we picked up a teddy bear, it was a bit of a slow day, but we were feeling in a creative and fun mood, and we always have a lot of scraps of leather lying around the workshop, so we thought we’d decorate the teddy bear a bit, giving him a kinky leather outfit purely for ourselves.
After we’d finishing him, we put an image of ‘Coo’ the bear on Fetlife, and, to our surprise, many people commented asking if we had others, and someone asked if they could purchase Coo. We chuckled a little that anyone would want such an item, but because of the huge response we had, we came up with an apt name ‘Fetibears’ as that’s where they were kind of born, on Fetlife, and decided to create more of them to help use up the remnants of leathers and re-home the teddy bears that were readily available at our local charity shops. Plus we loved the idea of repurposing as we are keen recyclers.
Since their launch, we’ve now rehomed over 40 of our Fetibears around the world. Including in the UK, America, Canada, Germany, Australia, Italy, France, Norway, Sweden, Japan, Mexico among others!
Alongside the ones we’ve created ourselves, we’ve had commissions to create leather, or vegan friendly outfits for people’s favourite bears that they send to us to dress – which is always an honour and a hugely fun task.
In recent years we’ve even had a bit of fun kinking up the big character bears like Tigger, Pooh, Spiderman, Hello Kitty, Smurfs and more! A lot of the time it’s a spur of the moment decision, we see a bear we like and then visualise the outfit they might wear, taking into account their character, facial expression, pose or colour. To a certain extent, the bear we start with predicts how the finished outfit will look and the name usually also comes to us during this process. We often chuckle when we spot a specific character bear when we can imagine how it’s completed kinkyfication will look.
Many people who buy our Fetibears once they have received them send us images of them settled in their new homes with other stuffies or pets as a new family. We’ve also got a few people who have taken to collecting them and have purchased quite a few from us which is great to see.
As you can imagine, every single bear is totally unique, no two are the same. One thing is for sure though, although we end up decorating many of the famous build-a-bears, we’d be surprised if they wanted to reproduce any of the outfits we create here at SubSpace Leathers.
Welcome to 2018!
2017 is now firmly over, the Christmas decorations are down, and we are all back in the workshop. However, 2017 was an amazing year for us, so we thought we’d write about our year and some of the highlights we’ve had. So here we are, a year in leatherwork, for you all to enjoy.
March – Metallic Leather, Fur
Having got last year started with high hopes, and even higher aims, we spent the first few months devising a great strategy and building up stock so we could focus on creating some fantastic new products for all you kinksters to enjoy. As part of that, we spent time with our amazing leather suppliers, giving us new ideas and new materials to work with. This led to our first new range, Metallics, Fur and we started work on our Vegan friendly range.
With our new ideas taking shape, we were running full steam ahead, and although we have our core focus on leather, more and more of you were asking for Vegan friendly products. It was a huge challenge finding the right materials that still met our high standards, but we did succeed. As such we set to work offering you the best quality Vegan friendly items for all of you into BDSM and indeed AB/DL activities. We were chuffed with the results and we continue to focus on these today – expending it as we go
Heading out of spring and into summer meant we had to step things up even further. Our main focus here was on using some of those amazing leathers we mentioned earlier and defining some amazing ranges to go with them. This led us to some of our premium designer rates, Commando (for when you want to look like you mean business), Pharaoh (for those wanting something a big sleeker and suggestive) and Unicorn (because Unicorns, DUH!). We absolutely love these ranges and spent many months perfecting them. I’m sure you’ll agree there’s some great products to enjoy in those ranges.
The summertime also gave us some new ideas, we worked on perfecting our strap-on designs, leading to us creating two new thigh strap designs in addition to the existing Adam and Eve ones.They give the user a different experience and a very different look, and we’re pleased to say you loved them!
June – New equipment
In June we also had some big changes in the workshop with some fantastic new pieces of equipment. As a result we’ve been able to increase the quality of our work and create some products that were impossible before – like our new high fall count floggers!
July – also deserves a special mention. Alongside the actives above, we invested in a new custom website and re-designed it to be more user friendly, easy to navigate and most importantly to better reflect who we are. It went live in August, and we could not be more proud.
November – Time to stay silent.
Well not literally. In November, heading toward the end of the year, we added to our Gag range, with many new Locking head harnesses, and introduced various multi change gag products for both BDSM and Fetish customers. They give more versatility and allow a lot more customisation. Our AB/DL customer especially have loved these!
We also managed to source and add a small selection of Dildos compatible with our strap on harnesses to the website – just in-case you wanted to buy the complete strap-on solution ;).
December – Fetishware launch.
As we came to the end of the year, we upped our game to show you what we can do when it comes to clothing. This resulted in the launch of our brand-spanking-new Fetishware Range including our new spanking skirt designs.
2017 was an amazing year for us, and the best part is that there’s so much more to come in 2018 – as ever, do get in touch to let us know what you’d like to see more of!
Have you ever been sitting there, loyal submissive at your feet but you just don’t like the look of the ball gag and want to switch to something a little different? It can be a bit of a faff changing them – and what’s more, a pretty costly one at that.
To remedy this situation, and give our customers much more choice, we’ve created a new range of products. They are much more versatile and cost-effective and will be offering them you in leather and VegaVegan-friendly, the eagle-eyed among you might have noticed that some have already been added to the website, including a few of the add-ons that will be available to build up your own custom variants. Think of it, as a ‘build-a-gag service’ ;).
Mix and match ABDL Pacigags
We are also catering to our ABDL customers. We will now be offering three fronts which can be swapped out – the gags can come apart to mix and match pacifier colours which gives a possible 27 colour combinations – more than enough to keep the most discerning ABDL player happy. Some of these are already on our website in both leather and PVC versions, and we’ll be adding blue versions, purple versions and separate add-on pacifier fronts with press stud fasteners to give you even more combinations.
Changeable AB/DL Multi Front Gags
In addition, another option is that you can get a large adult shield/teat pacifier front, a breathable ball gag front, and one of our unique insert gags (for pacifiers or other toys) allowing our customers to build up their collection over time The changeable three front piece gag is already available in four leather colours on the website, and we shall be adding to them with a Vegan-friendly version very soon as well as all the extra add-ons.
Although at the moment we’re working mainly on the AB/DL Fetish Leather and vegan-friendly multi-change gags, we haven’t forgotten about our core BDSM and Kinster friendly customers, and have several different new single purpose and multi-change leather and vegan-friendly gags available. There are also a lot more in development so keep checking the gags section of the site here to see our latest creations.
As ever, if you have an idea for a gag – or any other product – that you would like but that we haven’t listed, never hesitate to get in touch and we can help you create the product of your dreams through our bespoke service!
This might sound like an odd question to ask, but what it illustrates is how varied these implements can be, and how we all have different requirements and sometimes only the right tool will do.
With that in mind, we’ve been spending a lot of time trying to work on some new impact toys that help to meet these needs, and where possible, expand on them. One thing we’ve found, is that for all you masochists and sadists out there, some of our toys might not have ‘hit the mark’ as effectively as you might have liked. Enter our new range of studded paddles.
These impact toys are however not for the faint hearted and this is one of the rare cases we’d advise beginners to perhaps think long and hard before using one of these and even suggest the more experienced take their time and start slow. The spiked paddles in particular can and will do real damage – these toys are not toys so to speak. However, if pain is the game, and you aren’t afraid of a little blood and like marks, these will fit the bill perfectly.
Also, don’t forget that these paddles aren’t just made to inflict damage. On the contrary, if used carefully they can be a sensual addition to any toy box – whether that’s a gentle touch, a scratch or indeed abrasive play. Be it using them by slowly dragging the spikes over your sub’s back or backside, or using them as an incentive for someone who has been partially suspended not to put their heels on the ground 😉. These paddles can be very versatile. Our studded paddles aren’t quite as brutal as our spikes ones but will still leave heavy marks and be very painful too – in-case you were worrying we’d gone soft.
This is also great for mental play as this this will strike the fear of god into someone. This is a big, heavy duty paddle, and don’t forget you don’t have to use the spikey side, just using the standard non-spiked/studded side will do the job.
To check out our range of studded paddles, please click here. Also, as ever, if you have any questions or a bespoke request, feel free to contact us.
It’s fair to say there has been something of a revolution in recent years when it comes to the ‘strap-on’. It feels like we have moved on a long way from the days where they were reserved for pro-Domme’s and high paying customers. Perception of the activity has even moved into mainstream media – who can forget Ryan Reynolds enjoying a bit of fun with Morena Baccarin on International Women’s Day in Deadpool?
Given the enjoyment to be had, and new-found curiosity you might have, that leads us on to one big question: How do you even buy a strap-on? Now this, is a very good question, and a lot of people might do some quick google searches and then be a bit scared off, the choice can be a bit overwhelming. The key, is to go for simplicity.
There are two fundamental requirements, the strap-on harness, and the dildo you want to use. When it comes to the harness, we’d suggest avoiding straps that don’t use thick proper strap to hold it in the place. When you are pegging your partner, you don’t want the harness to either break or cut into your skin – which it might be if it’s too thin. We honestly believe that well-made leather harnesses will give the user a much better experience, with more control and less likelihood of a malfunction that might have painful repercussions for the person being pegged.
As you might expect, we decided to tackle this problem head on by creating our range of four strap-on harnesses. Our ‘Fully adjustable leather strap on harness’, two ‘two size ring design Adam strap on harness’ (one part of our Commando and the other part of our Pharaoh lines) and finally our ‘Maxi design leather strap on’. Any of the harnesses are great for experienced users and the uninitiated, however, we’d suggest the ‘Maxi design leather strap on’ for users that want a lot of control, and our two ring Adam strap on designs for those who expect they’ll want to use many different sized dildos. However, regardless of which you choose, you can specify the sizes, and colours, so it’s just right for your needs. All of our harnesses also use heavy duty welded rings to use to attach your dildo of choice, giving you flexibility to use one you feel most comfortable with.
That brings us nicely on to dildos. Although we don’t sell any -yet, we thought it worth giving a few words of advice. First off, if you are inexperienced, work with the person who is going to be pegged when choosing the first dildo you want to use. There are a plethora to choose from, so you will want to focus on those that are flexible (jelly type dildos) and relatively thin. Also, make sure you buy dildos that are designed to be used in a strap-on harness as otherwise, they won’t have the required flared base to enable you to use it in your harness. Also, don’t forget your lube. Lube is vitally important as it will make it more comfortable for the person being pegged – and is dangerous without. Brand worth trying include Liquid Silk and Pjur silicone lube (though if using Pjur make sure your dildo is silicone lube safe)
Follow these steps, and you’ll be having fun in no time at all! If you have any questions about our strap-on harnesses or any of our other products feel free to contact us!
A short writing about the definition of the term Únicorn’ used in the BDSM/Fetish lifestyle, and about how it seems to be very popular in the Vanilla communities at present, being very fashionable, a trend? and the colours associated with the modern version of Unicorns.
There’s actually very little written online about the association of Unicorns to BDSM, but i managed to find two fairly good descriptive ones to share that I’ve credited, and tons of colourful and bright images on google including a very early history image drawn by famous artist Leonardo Da Vinci of a Unicorn that i found particularly interesting being an art enthusiast!
Leonardo Da Vinci ‘Lady with unicorn (Young woman seated in a landscape with unicorn) Late 1470’s, Brown pen and ink on paper – credit commons.wikemedia.com
Definition 1 of Unicorn related to the BDSM Lifestyle as follows;
There’s a term nearly everybody in the Swinger world, the BDSM world, and the Polyamorous world is familiar with, summarized in one neat, pretty, sparkly mental image of one word: Unicorn. On the surface it’s a simple term, relating to the mythical creature of lore that is rumored to exist but is nearly impossible to find. Furthermore, once found, it’s nearly impossible to keep, for after all, nobody can really own a unicorn. (credit absinthepassion.wordpress.com )
Colloquial; Synonym for hot or Bi babe or HBB, often derogatory, condescending, or ironic. A bisexual person usually though not always female, who is willing to join an existing couple, often with the presumption that this person will date and become sexually involved with both members of that couple, and not demand anything or do anything which might cause problems or inconvenience to that couple.
The term is often used to be dismissive of a couple seen to be only superficially polyamorous. Because of the demands that this type of couple places on the woman (that she be single and not take on any additional partners, and become involved with both members of the couple equally, and often “complete” their family as a surrogate mother and housekeeper and/or breadwinner and not do anything that may threaten or disrupt the existing couple), many in the poly community call this type of woman a ‘Unicorn’, as in mythical and not likely to be found, even though there are plenty of bipoly women around.
Sometimes the unicorn is expected to not develop any emotional attachment and is strictly there for a sexual relationship (equally distributed to both members of the dyad) and/or is prescripted as a secondary. This term is used as a reminder that bipoly women are people with their own desires, needs, and pre-existing lives, and not fantasy figures or pets. (credit Urban dictionary.com).
Images and new modern definitions of Unicorns have certainly changed over the course of history from the age old pure white thoroughbred looking specimen of a horse (mostly Mares, female gendered I noticed after looking online at images) with the white flowing mane and central horn on the head often with a bright light seen shining around the profile, to the much more colourful versions of today with the white earlier version being softened and caricatured, with the added colours of the LBGT/Pride Rainbow symbolism added to the mouth or posterior of the Unicorns, along with shiny metallic shades and bright shining stars.
But what has made them so hugely fashionable recently it seems in both the BDSM and Vanilla communities? because everywhere you go these days there’s clear evidence of modern day Unicorns all around us, at BDSM fetish events, markets, and online fetish social media communities, on the local high streets and shopping centres in makeup departments selling rainbow coloured hair chalk, stationery shops advertising ‘Back to school’ Unicorn logo’d products, and Unicorns can even be found lining much rack space in our favorite Primark stores, with PJ’s and bath robes, pants and all things colourful and glittery.
So why are Unicorns so popular right now in both BDSM and Vanilla communities? anyone know? and is there a connection to the two different lifestyles? If you have any answers that might be useful, we’d appreciate any comments to share with those of us asking the very same questions about Unicorns.
Anyway, still on the very popular global subject of Unicorns, many of our customers have requested that we create some Unicorn coloured leather products, which at first seemed quite the challenge to us, that was until a leather supply shopping trip had us finding the perfect exotic metallic colourful Holographic leather skin that could be used, along with a selection of rainbow coloured leathers we had wanted to purchase to make a lovely Pride flogger;
From left to right Unicorn Flogger, Locking Collar with padlock and keys, Binky and holder clip strap, and the Pride 3mm wide flogger.
They can be found on our Website under our new category of Únicorn Designer’ which we shall be adding more products to shortly like our leather Unicorn Restraint cuffs and leash to match the collars.